Bush has always
declared that he will find weapons of mass destruction in Iraq. This despite
the fact that no one, after years of
searching – not the
United Nations Special Commission or the United Nations Monitoring, Verification,
and Inspection Commission, not the International Atomic Energy Agency, not
even Dick Cheney – has been able to find anything besides wishful thinking.
But something in the misinfosphere is making waves. In March 2004, the Mehrs News Agency1 stated “there have been reports that U.S. forces have unloaded a large cargo of parts for constructing long-range missiles and weapons of mass destruction (WMD) in the southern ports of Iraq.”
Of course, this could be bogus information by the Iranian government, but the day after this report Colin Powell made some threatening statements:
According to Associated Press, March 14, “Secretary of State Colin Powell put Iran on notice Sunday that other countries will not ‘just sit by idly’ while Tehran pursues building nuclear weapons.... ‘If they continue in this manner, to deny and to put out the kind of statements as they did, they’ll find that the international community will be prepared to take action’ when the agency meets in June, Powell said on Fox News Sunday. ‘I won’t prejudge now what those actions might be, but the Iranians need to understand that the international community is not going to just sit by idly while they continue to move in the direction of a nuclear weapon,’ Powell said.”
Wait, it gets even weirder: A Department of Defense whistleblower detailed an attempt by a covert U.S. team to plant weapons of mass destruction in Iraq. The team was later killed by friendly fire due to CIA incompetence.2
It’s possible that international scrutiny of the “found” weapons of mass destruction might prove that the weapons are indeed suspect, but by the time the election is over it’ll be too late.
Osama bin Laden has already been captured and is being hidden away somewhere, perhaps in Dick Cheney’s bunker.
In Late 2003 former Secretary of State Madeleine Albright told reporters that the Bush administration may already have captured Osama bin Laden and will release the news just before next year’s presidential election.
On Fox News Channel’s “Special Report with Brit Hume,” Roll Call reporter Morton Kondracke recounted Albright’s comments to him while she was waiting in the green room to appear on another show. Kondracke said the former Clinton official approached him and asked, “Do you suppose that the Bush administration has Osama bin Laden hidden away somewhere and will bring him out before the election?”3
In February 2004, citing “knowledgeable sources,” Tehran Radio reported that Osama bin Laden was captured. But the official Iranian media outlet did not specify when he was captured, and the report has yet to be confirmed elsewhere.4
An immaculately organized media frenzy will show split screens of a dilapidated bin Laden versus a triumphant George W. Bush. The push in popularity for Bush makes the expected stolen election more believable. This theory is known as the Bin Lotto.5
Unlike the unspectacular capture of Saddam Hussein last winter, the Bush team produces a dazzling video News Release that shows the leader of the Terror network surrounded and killed by U.S. forces in Pakistan. This Wag The Dog production is not so unlikely as the Bushies find themselves exposed for focusing way too much time on the war in Iraq and not enough in hunting down the Saudi fugitive. This theory is also more likely than the bin Laden captured scenario because it’s clear the Bush family will not want to put bin Laden on trial. This media bombshell makes the headlines for the week prior to the election. Most likely outcome? “We Got Him!” all over again.
Finds Weapons of Mass Destruction
Because he puts them there
Bin Laden is Captured
Bin Laden is Killed
Massive Terrorist attack on U.S. Soil
Scenario 1: Military Dictatorship
Scenario 2: Bombing the Republican National Convention
Scenario 3: Osama’s October Surprise, aka bin Laden Hearts Bush
Diebold Election Systems Fixes the Vote
in Battleground States
U.S. Opens a New War Front
article appeared in Lumpen #92